


Lock The Door, Throw Away the Key

by ibelieveinsherlockholmes2014



Category: Castlevania (Cartoon), 悪魔城ドラキュラ | Castlevania Series
Genre: Alucard needs a hug, Dark, Depression, F/M, Implied/Referenced Rape/Non-con, Implied/Referenced Sexual Assault, Implied/Referenced Underage Sex, M/M, Multi, Sad Ending, Suicidal Thoughts
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-03-13
Updated: 2020-03-13
Packaged: 2021-03-01 01:15:19
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Graphic Depictions Of Violence, Rape/Non-Con, Underage
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,374
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/23126866
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/ibelieveinsherlockholmes2014/pseuds/ibelieveinsherlockholmes2014
Summary: (Season 3 Spoilers)Honestly who the fuck thought it was okay to leave Alucard alone in the castle where he killed his father?  These writers are really trying to play me right now.Alucard reflects on his sad boi lifestyle the past few months. This is actually really dark so read at your own risk.
Relationships: (IMPLIED), Alucard | Adrian Tepes | Arikado Genya/Sumi/Taka, Alucard | Adrian Tepes | Arikado Genya/Trevor Belmont/Sypha Belnades
Comments: 2
Kudos: 82





	Lock The Door, Throw Away the Key

**Author's Note:**

> TW for Suicidal Thoughts, Sexual Assault, Depression
> 
> Please do not read if any of these themes could be triggering to you.

Alucard didn’t know the last time he slept, the last time he ate, Hell the last time he’d drank a glass of water. He wanted to die, though, he’d wanted that for quite some time. From the moment his mother passed, to fighting with his father, to quite literally sleeping in a coffin; Alucard had been ready to pass for a while. The dhaphir remembered telling Trevor and Sypha that his father died the day his mother did and now he was starting to think he’d passed that day as well. 

He stayed alive because he had a purpose, however. He had to defeat his father, he couldn’t do selfishly end his life when the world needed him alive. Then the Hunter and the Speaker had found him, they gave him some joy in what he’d hoped would be his last few days on this earth. The man made him laugh, the woman made him feel loved, they were his friends or the closest thing he had to some.

Alucard has been sure that he would die killing his father, that there would be some poetic justice in the world. A Vampire and a Dhaphir, a father and a son, a Tepes and a Tepes, their fierce battle would wipe out the last of Dracula and his bloodline and the world would be right again. He wasn’t worried about his Hunter and Speaker, he heard their heartbeats when they were around each other, he saw things he wasn’t sure they saw yet. They would be fine without him. 

Except his father didn’t kill him, Dracula had let his son kill the husk of the man that had once been Vlad Tepes and was now a twisted reminder of the rage that came with losing someone you loved, innocent of any wrong doing. Alucard had never wished himself dead as much as he did in that moment. Trevor and Sypha had been so delighted that the unstable vampire had finally been put down that they didn’t even notice how much pain Alucard was in. 

He understood really, to them Dracula was an evil tyrant that had tried to wipe out the entirety of humanity; to Alucard he was a father, a good one. Dracula had tucked him in at night, gave him warm milk to help him sleep. He was the man who picked up a sleeping Adrian Tepes and held him close when the boy woke in a cold fright. Dracula, or rather, Vlad was the man that danced around with his mother and smiled and loved. Alucard thought himself a monster, a cruel, monster undeserving of the very life he had. He was ready to seal up his coffin and never wake up again.

Alucard wasn’t surprised when Trevor told him they were leaving, though they’d never admit it, the Dhaphir’s constant melancholy demeanor was bringing them down. They had a big win, killing Dracula and ending his reign of terror, it was hard to be around someone as down as Alucard was. Their last request was for Alucard to stay alive and protect the knowledge of the Belmont Stronghold and Dracula’s castle. It felt more like a prison sentence than a reward. 

Did Alucard even deserve a reward? He gave up all he had for the world who thought him a monster, he didn’t act out his one wish in this world for humanity, for his Hunter and Speaker. He deserved something, yet instead he was left in the castle where he murdered his father with an assignment he never asked for. He was dying a little more each day, his mind practically eating itself as he spent his days, months, years alone. 

How long had it been since they left? Alucard stopped counting down the days when he remembered they never gave him a day they would return. He took that to mean they never would. The night he realized that he would be alone for the rest of his life was the second time he had ever wanted to end his life so badly. He didn’t know there would be a third. Of course, he couldn’t simply do it, end his miserable existence and finally leave this world in peace, unfortunately that would be to easy. No, he couldn’t give in. He’d made a promise to Trevor and Sypha. 

The dolls had been a product of lunacy, a state he found himself in more often as the days passed. He didn’t remember much about making them, just the fact that he’d either been hysterically laughing or hysterically crying. He kept them when he woke up the next day simply because they were something to talk to, something that helped him fill the silence. 

Taka and Sumi were like Trevor and Sypha and yet, they were completely different. Taka, unlike Trevor, was happy, a sweet boy that made Alucard feel less like a monster and more like a human being. Sumi was sarcastic and meddlesome, she demanded things from him. She wouldn’t take no for an answer and where Sypha was hesitant to ask any serious questions, Sumi didn’t see boundaries. They were perfect together, just like Trevor and Sypha, but unlike his Hunter and Speaker, Taka and Sumi wanted him. They were a family, a happy family and for a moment, just a single, solitary moment, he was actually happy.

It was funny how distractions always seemed so good in the beginning, that’s all they had been, distractions. They didn’t let him think about Trevor and Sypha, they entrapped him in their arms and suffocated him, slowly killing him yet he hadn’t seen the signs. Instead he saw how they made him forget about the cruel world outside the Castle and Belmont Hold. Everything was looking up.

And then it came crashing down.

Sypha always said he was a beautiful man, and while that was a common description people gave him, Alucard had never acted on this. He never... he’d never done anything. There was always something distracting him, to be honest. It had been a joke to Sypha, a meaningless throw away line about Alucard being a teenager stuck in a man’s body, but she wasn’t wrong. It was true, so when Sumi and Taka walked into his room in the middle of the night, claiming to be his reward, he’d been terrified.

Terrified but ready. He remembered crying, he remembered his confusion, his lust, he remembered the feeling of Sumi’s hands against his chest, her lips against his neck. He remembered Taka’s body rocking against him, the pounding, the pain and pleasure. It was a cruel mix of pleasure and pain that ended in a massacre.

He’d almost died, and for a second he almost let them do it. It would be so much easier to let himself finally die instead of dealing with all of this pain in his chest. It was only as they put their blades together and aimed them at his chest that Alucard called his sword. He made a promise, a vow to stay alive. 

He left the bodies there for the night, he didn’t know what to do, so instead of dealing with it, he walked naked and bleeding to his childhood bedroom. He found himself falling to the ground, tears streaming down his cheek as he stared at his fathers ring. He wanted to die, he wanted to leave this world and find his father and mother in hell. Or maybe this was hell, to live every day praying for death yet never allowing her to take you certainly felt like it. 

Instead of facing his pain, he decided to take his fathers approach, hide the soul crushing despair he felt and replace it with rage. He piked their body’s, setting their disgusting bodies up as bloody warnings of the monster behind Dracula’s doors. He sealed the doors and refused to open them ever again. No longer would he allow himself to be fooled by humans, not from people like Sypha and Trevor, not from people like Taka and Sumi. He was alone and he liked it that way, he was safe this way.

He burned the dolls after sealing the doors and contemplated throwing himself in the fire as well.


End file.
